Music and me

Okay, so i've been gone for a minute (almost a month.. not too bad this time..lol) A LOT has happened since my last post... so much so that it seems like the last one was written eons ago...smh. I wish i could say most of what transpired has been 'good' but yea.. that would be a lie.. and i'm tryna live right so yea.. haha.. Hasn't been all bad though.. Definately learned a lot about myself and life in general.. so i can't complain much.. :)

anyways... done with the intro and all that... I have not really got anything in particular to write about... okay, i lie.. I do have a lot on my mind (excess baggage kinda 'lot'..lol) but i don't know where to start or if i'm even ready to 'share'... *shrugs*.. so yea.. once again i shall go on about 'nothing' :-D.. Now, some may ask "Is it by force for her to blog, she aint got nothing to say.. why she gotta write though?" well yea, it's by force!! 'Fi mi le'.. I think its kinda lame to have a blog and not update it regularily.. even if people don't read it..lol.. :-P (I DO hope people do read this though.. PLEASE read my blog.. pretty please.. :-D lol)

This post is dedicated to Music... Haven't done a proper music post in a while.. So yea, i think one is in order.. Plus music helps take my mind off things and helps elevate my mood sometimes (psych talk).. I can get high of music.. *sigh* :) lol. Going to put the top 5 most requested (lol) or played songs on my ipod.. In no particular order other than one must come before the other.. (i've always wanted to say that..haha) Here goes!

1. AIN'T THINKING ABOUT YOU - Chris Brown & Tyga

"I just wanna have a good time,

keep you out my mind,

find a little shawty I like.."

my fav. line from the song... that and,

"but it's alright, it's okay

my blackberry's filled with

a whole bunch of women.."

and...

"Used to be you that I liked,

but I'm gonna do what I like

tonight.."

Let's just say I love the whole song..hehe.. And Tyga is actually a decent lyricist.. He finally made me a fan.. that's not an easy feat to accomplish..

It's so ironic too, or should i say strange because if you know me, you know I'm not a CB fan.. But I won't lie.. I'm quite feeling his new cd/mixtape.. It's like homeboy is tryna win my heart back... He can't though.. Cos I'm married to Ri-Ri. Me and Chris will just have to be friends... *sigh*

#NowOnToSongNumberTwo

2. ALL I WANT IS YOU- Miguel & J. Cole

"At best all they do is distract me but now,

deep down, when I face it, all I want is you.."

Another song i'm in love with atm... I don't know why.. Cos the 'story-line' is kinda um... well, dumb. I mean, he wants her now that she's gone.. Implying that she was once there.. with him.. and then he fucked shit up.. And now she's just supposed to just come back... Haha.. jokes.

"Cos they don't smile or smell like you,

cos they don't make me laugh, or even cook like you

girl they don't photograph.. nah they don't sex like you

let's face it, i can't replace it..

all i want is you.."

lol. How cute... You live and you learn though.. Next time don't do such, you hear. Don't let her go..haha. Still love the song.. been listening to it non-stop for a couple of weeks now... and it doesn't look like i'm gonna get tired of it any time soon...

#songnumberthree...

3. SINGLE - Lil' Wayne

"And I aint tripping on nothing,

I'm sipping on something..

and my homeboy say he got a bad

bitch for me tonight.." ;-)

Mehn Weezy sounds mad 'breezy' on that one..haha.. Sound like he on cloud 9... Especially right before he goes, "Polo T-shirt, Polo drawers".. haha.. Listen to it well.. sounds like he took a puff right before..lol.. I don't blame him.. the beat/backing track (think that's what its called..no?) sounds like one of them records that was made to get high to... Don't ask me how I know.. I heard people talk. But yea.. I love that song.. it's mad chilled...

"Put your hands up if you're single for the night.." - so after the night what happens though?smh.. Anyways.. My hand is up... "Yea, I'm single, nigga had to cancel that bitch like nino.." haha

#songnumberfour

4. HOLDING YOU DOWN - Jazmine Sullivan

"Its a shame that you don't care enough to even give me half the love I give to you.."

"I'm ashamed to say that I'm to blame for how you act.. Cos I keep coming back.."

I pray that never happens to me. Amen! lol... On the real though.. then it goes,

"I feel so stupid... foolish 'loving' you this way.."

You should. Dumb broad..haha.. #nodisrespect.. But how you gonna go back to a nigga who aint treat you right? I don't understand.. You know he doing wrong, you know he's trifling and its hard to let go? Really. How..? Why..? Well let me not talk too much.. I'm going to fast and pray that I never find my self in such a situation.. Cos if I do.. hmm.. Let me not talk too much..

"I'll stay cos I love you but I hate that I stay..

you know I won't go that's why you treat me this way..

I wanna be happy though it hurts me so bad

don't know what it is that keeps me coming back.."

Smh at the whole scenario.. If that's what 'love' does, then I don't want. Thanks. I'm not interested.lol.. But then again, it's only a song, right? Shit like that don't happen in real life.. *sideeye*

#andthenfinally

5. LOVE THE WAY YOU LIE - Eminem & Rhianna

Okay, I don't like it. In fact, I HATE being lied to.. I however, like the song.. well, only the hook.. (i'm in love with Rihanna (#nohomo... well maybe a little.. ;) I have no idea what that boy was going on about.. Only heard "next time there will be no next time.." and then something about burning a house down..? Why that dude gotta be so violent though..?smh..

Bonus track... cos i like y'all so much... :-D

GOT YOUR BACK - T.I & Keri Hilson...

"When we're high, when we're low

when I promise I will never let you go

said I got I got I got your back boy.."

"Keep my swagga, keep it looking good for ya

keep it looking hood for ya.."

Awww. I love this song cos it's about love.. lol.. Like the proper love that people should have/want. The kind that makes a little sense. Not dysfunctional love. It's a damn shame that T.I and Tiny just got in trouble (again!-boy, you don't want to learn?smh..) But yea.. The song is hott... I hope I meet someone that makes me like 'feel' the song, if you know what I mean. Anyways I hope my man T.I doesn't have to go away again. and i wish him and Tiny the best.. they actually make quite a cute couple.. Can't hate on them.

Now that i think about it, there's more songs.. like 'I just haven't met you yet'- Michael Bubble; B.M.F - Ricky Rose; 'The man who can not be moved' - The Script; 'Te Amo' - 'Rihanna; Cooler than Me' - Mike Posner; DEUCES!!!!! - Chris Brown and Tyga! i think i need to dedicate that one to a couple motherf*$#!s.. but, nah... I'll let it slide.. I see y'all m.f's though... Don't think I don't.. haha.. It's all love though.. Like really.. lol.. But I should do a post about some m.fs soon.. hmm... lol. We'll see..

Anyways.. I've gotta be out.. need to 'work on my fitness', my gym life's been dulling atm.. tres sad.. i need to fix that asap, cos it's not cool at all.. But I don't know how/what to do anymore.. *sigh* Then I've got school work.. among other things i gotta deal with.. *doublesigh*.. I shall try to write again soon.. Deuces!(lol)

*~the ever sexy~*

.oao.

ps: I hope that y'all 'missed me a little when i was gone'.. *said in Drake voice*lol

more randomness

Repression... That's my way of dealing with things... Maybe if I don't think about it, it will go away... Maybe if I act like its not there it won't be... Maybe... Haha, but I know it doesn't work that way. I'm not so deluded as to think that the mare fact that I wish something would go away would make it do so. The connotation, is what we psychologists and psychotherapists refer to as an extended mand... A 'wish' that simply cannot come true. And in the event that it does is only due to a phenomenon known as accidental reinforcement which goes hand-in-hand with (but is neither correlated with nor caused by) variable schedule of reinforcement which tends to cause persistent habits or as we in the field call it, high frequency of behaviors which are hard to extinguish. *sighs* I love my psychology, don't I? Lol.

 Well that's my little rant for the day. I'm still gonna repress ish though.. At least outwardly at first... And then it should extend to the inner psyche and being.. Cos as the saying goes, "as a (wo)man thinketh in (her)his heart, so is (s)he"... I think I'm fine, I believe I am alright, so therefore I am! Yay me!!! Lol. Conventional Psychology can go and suck on that.. This is the remix. Lol... 

Y'all be sexy now.. And have a sexy day. Ps: good luck with finals and stuff. Don't let the system get u down! Haha. Drink a coke (or whatever floats ur boat *coughs*~VODKA~*coughs*lol) and smile! :-)) (yea, I'm random like that sometimes... Sue me! :-p)

The Sexiest repressor everr!

'o.a.o'

random...

Once again I am very depressed................................ :-((

I shall give you the details shortly... but yea... I am studying with my homie atm... and she's making me laugh, so it's not that bad right now... anyways anyways anyways, I realize that I am chatting bare breeze once again.. so I shall...... Oh wait!!! she just gave me mad gist!!!!! haha... too bad I can't put it on here... at least not just yet.. :-p but yea.. I'm retiring to my depressed state once again.. and shall be hibernating in that zones for a bit too... at least until.... dang.. there's so much to say, but i-can't-actually-say... lol

ps: sorry if i didn't make sense in this post... its like my first time 'free-styling'.. (i.e. blogging straight from my mind, without writing it on paper first...) so bear with me.. lol.. okay gotta go read for some dumb-ass exams... *sighs*..... my life really does suck right now... I'm going to cry!!!

Bye~Sexys...

Sexy~sexY

o.a.o

Nothing...

Okay, so I feel like I haven't holla'd in a minute... and I still have nothing to write about.. hmmmm

Well, I just read a poem my friend wrote when she was in js3 (year9? anyways she was really young..) so don't judge. I just thought it was really funny and it made me laugh... Unfortunately, as I am typing this post I do not have the actual poem, so I shall put it up tomorrow or later today.

Yea, so my babe wrote about how she has to loose 10lbs in about 2 weeks.. and guess what? she's half way there.. yayy her!! I on the other hand, seem to have found the weight she lost.. *sighs* damn all that chocolate and candy!!! *sob*sob* 

Anyways I am about to jump on that weight loss wagon (once again).. hopefully this time I wont fall off, cos I have all of 30lbs to loose asap... Anyways, Anyways, Anyways... I am mad at all these skinny b's walking around the whole place naked. Ah, ahn its not fair! Must they oppress and depress me so... They shouldn't worry though gimme time.. (3 weeks to be precise) and I too, shall be walking around NAKED!! hehe. I just felt like having a little rant.. but I'm soooo serious though. Anyone know how to loose 50lbs fast (without cutting off any limbs ?!!?!lol) holla at me, I'm willing to make it worth your time if it works.. ;-) 

Yea, for someone who had nothing to say, I have said quite a bit, but yea, I'll holla. I'm about to go run and maybe play some basketball... and then lift some weights.. (yayy me!!) I need to release some tension. It's going to be a long week... no food; there's finals and papers and... *sighs*

Oh yea, if you were wondering about my 5-day hunger strike, I had to call it off after 2.5 days due to unforseen circumstances, which involved an ambulance, some morphine, a retarded nurse and a neurotic doctor... I shall attempt it once again though.. after finals and ish...

I'm loving the weather.. need to buy some sunscreen asap or I shall burn, (like usher..lol!!!) Okay, I'm starting to chat rubbish. Peace sexys. mwahh!

sexy~pixie

'o.a.o'

ps: on a sad note... R.I.P Mary-Kate, Ashley, Beyonce, John Legend and Victoria Beckham.. Our gold fishies that died after 4 days... sad really... a real tragedy :-(

Random gist

So I heard that an ex broke up with his girlfriend the other day, and I was so happy for a second, I almost got up and danced like a fool (was at the gym at the time- on my weight loss mission- 0 down; 40 to go.. let's go there! lol)...

But yea, is it wrong for me to have been happy? Asin really, I wouldn't want him to be happy if I broke up with my boyfriend.. And it's not like I still have feelings for him or anything... at least not anymore..

I kinda liked him for a bit after we broke up, even when he was with her. They were together for about 3 years and all the while I thought to myself "What does homie see in this babe?.. she ain't even all that..." (and this wasn't just the haterade talking btw..) but yea, I think the babe beefed me too.. Why, I don't know... I shouldn't even care, 'cos I ended it, but it still hunted me all the same, guess 'cos deep down I knew I didn't do it for the right reasons (yes, I'm woman enough to admit it..) but that's a different story altogether...

Anyways I am rather cuffed they broke up and I kinda have a reason now.. (see why blogging is good!lol) I think it's 'cos he's a really good person and I knew she wasn't good enough for him... took him three years to find out though...lol

Alright, I'm tired of writing about his ass.. my arm is starting to hurt... lol.. I wish him the best, and hope his next girlfriend treats him right... He deserves it. And if 'YOU' happen to read this- and know who you are too.. (cos Lord knows I've got enough ex's... lmao..jk, oh! lol) I am sorry I ended things the way I did, it was wrong and I felt horrible for the longest time.. still do sometimes... Hope you can lyk forgive me and that we can be friends like we were again.. take care of you... and don't be upset 'bout the break up.. heifer was a 'ho'.. don't act like you ain't know..lol.. so smile.. :-)

To my wonderful and beautiful readers, hope this entry wasn't too self-centered and that you learned something form it... lol... [And the moral of the story is.... don't break up with your boyfriend/girlfriend for a random reason... or you'll feel bad.. haha.. true story.. Unless his trifling ass cheats.. then bust the windows out that m.f's car! Shoot, I'll even help you do it too.. and guys, if your lady cheats, just forgive her, chances are you effed up.. lol].. Until next time y'all... stay sexy! mwah..xxx

ps: all this talk about ex stuvz.... y'all shouldn't think I'm still stuck on him.. I mean, he's cool et all.. but I've moved on.. have a couple of sweethearts in my life atm.. (for the most part anyways..lol)- shout out to my boos.. ('iyawo' and 'sunsh!ne') where y'all at?! ;-) lol..xoxo

~*~_sexy ~ stuvz_~*~

*

o.a.o